4e7 09'
syamsiah
shahirah
mash
gregory
khairi
jazielah
jiamei
nadia
zarina

its typical right?

when someone tells you to do something you always dont. or do it only to please them.

when they stopped caring then you think of how good and "well-behaved" you could have been.

sigh.

life.

so i read this at the book the other day;

"Time and whisky and keeping busy. You have to keep busy. Dont stop. It doesn't really matter

what you're doing, just do it the best you can and the hardest you can.

Yup, you have to find ways of filling the time. When the person i cared for left i spent the first few months waiting for time to go by. Every morning i'd wake early, and i was looking out over the day and it was a desert. It stretched ahead with nothing in it except flatness and grief, and i

didnt know how to get across it. I didnt even think to call it grieving - all i know was that now i

had to get on with it on my own. One day and then the next and the next. All the things you do

together and take for granted. Silly jokes. Getting on with little things together. Making

arrangements, then breaking them. Even the little squabbles are part of it. When all that goes,

there's this great big space you have to fill up. And not just with memories and tears.

Chocolate, whisky, long hot baths and keeping busy. "

So UT's over. Like finally.

But honestly, i didnt even study.

Yeap, not even abit. Ok maybe OB abit only. Heh.

I honestly alrd told my parents i dont wangt to study for it,

So there's no one else who would scold me. So for wad study. Ha-Ha.

So i was thinking of going on a holiday.

I mean, just go somewhere alone just away from singapore.

I was thinking about Genting. I've been really wanting to go there.

We were supposed to go there. WERE.

Or maybe Port Dickson. So long never go there liao.

Or was thinking Macau.. I've never been there.

Or Bali. I love the beach there. Awesomely beautiful. Can surf there. but i've been there alrd.

Just this year i managed to save almost 3K,and now i really feel like going for holiday.

Its like, i deserve at least some time away loh.

End of the year too long, cant wait.

But mom kept saying my savings can buy car. But car? got enough alrd lah.

I really really reallyyyyyy wanna just leave.

I gt check for flights and hotels online. mmmm

My sis also said she wanna stay at my 2nd house to study.

Then she ask me accompany her.

So i told my mom, if want i can accompany her but she must leave 1 car there for me.

So i can go out buy food for the 2 of us. She say she dont mind.

But there like..very quiet leh. And dangerous?

Or worst come to worst i go back "hometown".

There at least got family members to accompany me.

I dont mind that too. Sigh.

See how loh.

Can i just sleep? Like for a looooonnnnggg time.